Stoicism: A Tech Leader’s Best Friend

One philosophy that I think can most help a business leader in the fast-paced world of tech can be found by going back to the wisdom of the stoics like Marcus Aurelius and Seneca. 

Before we delve into the minds of the ancients, I want to tell you about a guy, who wrapped himself in the warm blanket of stoicism to help him get through more than one tough situation, my publisher and editor Mike Spradlin. 

For years, Mike battled X-linked hypophosphatemia (XLH), a rare inherited bone disease that causes chronic pain, weak bones, and countless complications. More recently, he fought colon cancer and nearly died from a bone infection following hip replacement surgery. 

Despite all that, he never stopped writing. 

Mike authored more than two million books for young readers, including historical adventures such as The Raven's Shadow, in which teenage Charles Darwin, Abraham Lincoln, and Edgar Allan Poe battle Count Dracula in 1820s Washington, D.C. He possessed a wonderfully overactive imagination—one example being that he continues to believe there is value in my writing. 

A former baseball catcher, Mike exuded toughness. Yet what impressed me even more than his physical endurance was his attitude. 

Whenever I’d tell him I wished he didn't have to endure so much pain, he would shrug and say, "Other people have it worse than me." 

He even joked about chemotherapy and its many unpleasant side effects, such as what he described as “nuclear constipation”. 

Sadly, we lost Mike to a stroke in April of this year.  I will miss Mike’s inspirational embrace of Stoicism. 

Ironically, I first encountered the word not in philosophy class but at my veterinarian's office. Our Labrador Retrievers, Toddie and Pearl, regularly found creative ways to injure themselves. Whenever I asked Dr. Ted Vaughn why they weren't showing signs of pain, he'd simply smile and say, "Typical stoic Lab." 

Curious, I looked up the word. 

Stoicism is a practical philosophy that teaches us to focus on what we can control and let go of what we cannot. Founded by Zeno of Citium in ancient Greece around 300 BC and later refined by Roman thinkers such as Epictetus, Seneca, and Marcus Aurelius, Stoicism argues that external events are neither good nor bad. Our suffering comes from the judgments we place upon those events. 

The Stoics divided life into two categories. 

First are the things we control: our choices, attitudes, actions, and character. 

Second are the things we cannot control: other people's behavior, luck, outcomes, illness, and countless external events. 

Marcus Aurelius summarized the philosophy perfectly: 

"The obstacle on the path becomes the way." 

Rather than viewing hardship as punishment, Stoics see it as training. 

That idea explains why many successful people willingly embrace difficult routines. Rising before dawn to exercise, studying while others sleep, or practicing long after everyone else has gone home isn't viewed as suffering. It's viewed as preparation. 

An old saying captures it well: 

"If you want to soar with the eagles, you have to get up with the chickens." 

Many highly successful executives—including JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon and Allegheny College alumnus Bruce Thompson, Vice Chair of Bank of America—have described beginning their days around five o'clock each morning. Those quiet hours allow them to think, exercise, and prepare before the world demands their attention. 

Stoic thinking also appears in unexpected places. 

Many observers have noted the philosophical similarities between Stoicism and Alcoholics Anonymous. 

The Serenity Prayer asks for the wisdom to distinguish between what can and cannot be changed—the very distinction that lies at the heart of Stoicism. 

Likewise, AA's Twelve Steps emphasize personal responsibility, self-examination, humility, and continual moral improvement, principles that echo the teachings of Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius. 

Although I never struggled with alcoholism, I spent years discussing these ideas with my therapist, Dr. Bill Kraft. 

My issues stemmed from surviving a catastrophic construction accident in 1978 during my junior year of high school. Severe burns left me with mild post-traumatic stress disorder and obsessive-compulsive tendencies. 

The fire rewired my brain. 

I became obsessed with planning, order, punctuality, and anticipating problems before they occurred. I make endless lists. I arrive at airports ridiculously early. I dislike tight connections. I constantly prepare for worst-case scenarios even while hoping for the best. 

During our weekly sessions, I'd often describe some looming business crisis. 

An engineering project was behind schedule. 

A customer was upset. 

A competitor had introduced a new product. 

Every time, Dr. Kraft would patiently listen before asking one simple question. 

"So what?" 

If the worst happened, would I die? 

No. 

Would I deal with it? 

Of course. 

That simple question fundamentally changed the way I handled adversity. 

Its greatest test came during my years as CEO of Tollgrade Communications. 

In 1998, labor strikes at several Regional Bell Operating Companies caused customers to stop placing equipment orders. While visiting clients in Denver, I received a voicemail from our head of sales informing me that Bell Atlantic—one of our largest customers—would not place its expected quarterly order. 

Instantly, I realized we were likely to miss Wall Street's earnings expectations for the first time since becoming a public company. 

That was potentially catastrophic. 

Instead of panicking, I remembered Dr. Kraft's words. 

"So what?" 

I called Mark Peterson and said: 

"Let's bring everyone together and see what we can do. And Mark, we're both still among the living." 

We both laughed. 

We ultimately missed expectations by a narrow margin. After our earnings warning, Tollgrade's stock lost roughly half its value within hours. Yet within weeks, it recovered to its previous level. 

The sky hadn't fallen. 

Seneca famously wrote: 

"We suffer more in imagination than in reality." 

He was right. 

The crisis proved far less devastating than the fear preceding it. 

My deeper appreciation for Stoicism came after reading Ryan Holiday's outstanding book The Obstacle Is the Way. Holiday demonstrates how leaders from Theodore Roosevelt to Steve Jobs transformed setbacks into opportunities by controlling their responses rather than complaining about circumstances. 

That lesson appears repeatedly throughout history. 

Arnold Schwarzenegger begins virtually every day with a bike ride followed by weight training at Gold's Gym before breakfast. He has said life appears black-and-white until he starts training, when suddenly it turns to color. 

Arnold simply calls it "getting in the reps." 

Military organizations understand the same principle. 

They know that courage is rarely spontaneous. 

It is practiced. 

In books like Lone Survivor and Band of Brothers, soldiers survive unimaginable circumstances because relentless training transforms discipline into instinct. 

Marcus Luttrell survived Operation Red Wings largely because years of Navy SEAL training enabled him to keep functioning despite catastrophic injuries. 

Likewise, Stephen Ambrose's Band of Brothers demonstrates how Easy Company's brutal preparation forged trust, discipline, and emotional control that carried them from Normandy through Bastogne and ultimately to victory. 

One memorable line from the HBO adaptation captures Stoic thinking perfectly. Lieutenant Ron Speirs tells a frightened soldier: 

"The only hope you have is to accept the fact that you're already dead. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll function the way a soldier is supposed to." 

The statement is shocking, but its meaning is deeply Stoic. 

Once fear loses its grip, action becomes possible. 

Training becomes instinct. 

Calm replaces panic. 

Whether in combat, athletics, business, or everyday life, repetition transforms extraordinary performance into ordinary behavior. 

The same lesson appears in literature. 

While studying English at Allegheny College, I encountered Ernest Hemingway's "code hero," best represented by Santiago in The Old Man and the Sea. 

After eighty-four days without catching a fish, Santiago refuses to surrender. 

He cannot control the sea. 

He cannot control luck. 

He cannot control the sharks that eventually destroy his magnificent marlin. 

But he can control himself. 

He faces pain without complaint, defeat without surrender, and hardship without bitterness. 

His dignity comes not from winning but from how he responds. 

In many ways, Santiago lives exactly as the Stoics taught. 

Life will inevitably include suffering. 

Illness. 

Failure. 

Loss. 

Disappointment. 

None of us escapes the fire. 

The question is not whether adversity will come but how we choose to meet it. 

Mike Spradlin continues writing despite chronic pain. 

Athletes embrace grueling training before dawn. 

Soldiers endure endless repetition before entering combat. 

Business leaders recover from crushing setbacks. 

Recovery programs teach people to focus only on today's choices. 

Santiago rows back to shore with little to show for his epic struggle except his character. 

Different lives. 

Different circumstances. 

The same philosophy. 

Stoicism does not ask us to deny pain. 

It asks us to refuse to let pain define us. 

The great leaders you'll meet throughout this book did not become remarkable because hardship spared them. 

They became remarkable because hardship forged them. 

Like steel in a furnace or the legendary phoenix rising from its ashes, adversity became the very force that transformed them. 

The obstacle truly became the way. 

As you'll see throughout the chapters ahead, extraordinary people are rarely born extraordinary. 

They become extraordinary by repeatedly choosing courage over fear, discipline over comfort, and resilience over despair. 

That choice is available to every one of us. 

 

Chris Allison is entrepreneur-in-residence at Allegheny College.  He was one of the founders of Tollgrade Communications, Inc., whose story was told in Hit It: A Tech Startup Story and Seven Rules For Entrepreneurs. His new book, now available on Amazon, is Forged In Fire: 12 Stories of Fantastic Transformation.